Thursday, October 13, 2011

And I say to myself, What a crazy life

Phew my life is a whirlwind of craziness. I am so glad I started blogging. Even though I haven't posted a lot of Prim recently I still love getting on and seeing what everyone else is up to. It is like the calm in my storm.

My mom is in a nursing home, in the residential unit for dementia patients. Saturday morning about 6am the phone rings. Caller ID says it is the nursing home, I thought I was going to faint when I read it, knowing it couldn't be good. Mom had gotten out in the night and they didn't find her until morning. We have had some very cold nights here already, down in the 20s. Well Thank God it was only down to about 38 that night. The nurse is telling me what happened, I just keep saying, "is she alright". I couldn't think. I couldn't breathe. 
When I got to the emergency room and saw my sweet tiny mom all wrapped up and under this weird heating equipment it just got worse. They were not very optimistic. Her body temp was only 80. It was so scary.

Well she is one tough lady, within hours she was setting up and talking and awake. She spent a few days in intensive care, watching for organ failure and also the other effects of hypothermia. 
Tomorrow I have a meeting at the nursing home, I do hope I can be patient and civil. My mom is back there now, on a different floor, for rehab. she will need some physical therapy, and still on IV antibiotics for the pneumonia/fever. She is very weak, but she was in such a good mood yesterday.

I really want to go there and yell and scream at them. I don't want to hear the excuses. I don't really know what they can say to make it better. It would be different if this was the first time but it is not. 
What do I do, what do I say? We have put the care of our loved ones in their hands. All I ask is that they keep her safe. That is all I have ever asked. They knew the alarms weren't working but hadn't gotten them fixed. They thought it would be okay. WELL it wasn't. My mom has been there so long I can't move her. That would be so traumatizing to her as well. I wish I could bring her home but I know I can't care for her.
Anyone have any suggestions?
Thanks for listening.


  1. Oh my goodness. Thank the Lord she is okay. If she has to stay there, I'd get in touch with a lawyer to make sure they get their alarms fixed. Your mom should be allowed to stay there cost free for their incompetence. You probably should start looking for a safer place for her though. That was a close call.

  2. I am so sorry that your Mom and your family had to go through something so traumatic. I am happy to hear that your Mom is going to be OK. I would say it is time to bring in the authorities and get the negligence on the part of the nursing home on record which should force them to make some needed changes and repairs.

    God Bless!


  3. Oh Poor Kat, I agree with the other two comments. That alarm system should be fixed and NOW. I am so sorry for you and for your Mom but am so thankful she is getting better. But had the system been working this would not have happened. I would talk to a lawyer.
    My mother is also in a nursing home, but she is not able to leave her bed. She has been in for years and is now on Hospice. We have been blessed with her there and the care she has been given, but so many do not have such a positive experience.
    My suggestion is be firm when you meet with them but try and keep your cool. You don't want to get on their bad side as your Mother has to depend on them. BUT they should be doing their part and take all precautions to have a safe enviroment. I sure hope this will be taken care of. I know exactly how you felt when the home's number shows up on the ID. Hubby says he knows before I tell him as I turn white all over. My prayers will be with you and your Mom. Please keep us posted on her progress.
    Sending a big hug your way

  4. I can only imagine how this made you feel Kat! I agree with the other posts at this time ... see an attorney or file a complaint with someone who will see to it that those alarms are fixed! Broken alarms are unheard of! And for them to say they "thought it would be okay!" Unbelievable! And make sure what happened is documented in case it happens again. I would not suggest going in there screaming & yelling at these people. It will put you at a disadvantage. Simply be very firm & tell them this was unacceptable & that if anything even remotely like this ever happens again, you will see them in court. My prayers are with you & your mom. Blessings, Shirlee

  5. They would probably get shut down if the state knew they were operating without alarms. The alarms where my dad used to be were always going off, but they kept the people safe. Be civil, but be assertive. This is their job, there are no excuses. I would be in jail right now if I were in your shoes. Bless your heart, and your dear mom. Prayers for peace, strength & courage ~*~Lisa

  6. Kat~ so sorry about your Mom~ oh my to be out in the cold~ terrible situation~ thank the Lord she is doing better~
    I say with the other gals~ time to get others involved, the alarms should be working at all times~
    Prayers for you & your Mother~

  7. Oh dear Kat - so sorry to read of this - and praying for your mum. What a traumatic ordeal. I agree with most of what everyone else has said - especially when you meet with these folks - yelling, kicking and screaming will not get you anywhere and will likely make things more difficult for your mother in the long run. But, I would strongly suggest you relocate your mother AS SOON AS POSSIBLE! I know it's not easy and will be traumatic for her - but she will adjust. You said this was not the first time? Holy heck....I'd have had her moved after Incident #2....Yes, this needs to be reported, but, again, I think this weighs in favor of relocating your mother as you would not want your reporting this to affect the quality or level of care your mother receives. I know it SHOULDN'T and trust that most caregivers are professional - but, they are, after all HUMAN, and given this facility's track record with the alarms, etc., professionalism and protocol aren't apparently their strengths. Just my opinion sweetie....but had to say it. Wishing you and your mum the best....Hugs ~ Robin

  8. I agree that the authorities need to be called in. Something like this shouldn't happen especially more than once. Glad your mom is ok. I would seriously consider transferring her to another facility. I know it must be very hard dealing with all this. Prayers for you both!